Uncharted territory

Just posted on TapesandChampagne.com.

Tapes and Champagne

Today I’ll be taking some time to tell you a little more about charts and graphs, because I love charts…and graphs. They’re useful, sometimes colourful and they come in all different shapes and sizes. For the most part though we only know about the most commonly used ones like the column graph, the line graph or the pie chart, but there are so many more out there! Like the radial tree chart, or the doughnut chart or the multi-level pie chart.

I will be focusing mainly on the doughnut chart, because it sounds adorable! Now I don’t really know how doughnut charts work, but I suppose it’s more or less the same as a pie chart, just less full. I, myself have never used one and I just feel like now is the time to change that.

So there are two types of doughnut charts (apparently): doughnut and…

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THE FOLLOWING: AN ATTEMPTED PUBLIC APOLOGY TO MY VERY TINY FOLLOWING

Tapes and Champagne

To the 15 people who follow and read my blog. I am sorry that we’re still only in the double digits. It must not be easy to carry the obligation of having to read stuff that no one else has to. Bear in mind that it was my intention to have MILLIONS of followers by now, but clearly life just doesn’t give a shit about what my intentions are.

Followers [FOR NOW!] See the plan was to grow slow at first, until ‘someone’ discovers me and they’d be like oh snap – this is THE BEST BLOG EVAR! They’d share my awesome posts on various social media sites which brings me many, many, MANY followers.

So now because of all my followers, advertisers will be begging me for some advertising space and shit. I take some time to consider, and I only settle on really cool non annoying ads –…

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MUGSHOTS.

Tapes and Champagne

Welcome to our lineup. (Click on the mugshot to view large image.)

2014-02-11 20.44.302014-02-11 20.32.17

                        [stating the obvious]                                                                [outdated]

2014-02-11 20.33.342014-02-11 20.35.32

                            [hates Mondays]                                                              [freaking adorable]

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                                 [immigrant]                                                    …

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Wishful ranting.

Tapes and Champagne

Okay, so I’ve been thinking about this ‘if you had only one wish what would you wish for’ scenario and I guess what you ultimately wish for would be contingent upon a lot of things really, for example:

  • Do I have to use it immediately?
  • Does this wish expire?
  • Are there any terms and conditions? (These days one should always ask.)
  • Is it free? (This is not a stupid question, we live in a capitalist world, they sell stars for God’s sake, I mean, who the fuck owns the stars? (That’s a different rant I’m sorry))
  • Where do I verify whether this person is in fact capable of granting such wishes?
  • How many other people have been granted wishes? (Just for interest sake)

Now let’s delve in a little deeper and say that your one wish was to be immortal, and let’s say that for argument’s sake your wish…

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More Scrubs Please.

Tapes and Champagne

No not the series with Zach Braff. Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s marvel at the genius that is this cover.

Now for those of you who don’t know what a ‘Scrub’ is, according to TLC it’s basically just a guy who thinks he’s fly, and who is apparently also known as a buster(Word)

So I don’t know about you, but I grew up in the 90s so I learnt everything I need to know about ‘Scrubs’ from the TLC hit song “No Scrubs”. For instance:

  • I shouldn’t want his number.
  • I shouldn’t want to give him mine.
  • I wouldn’t want to meet him nowhere.
  • I don’t want NONE of his time.
  • And most importantly, I just shouldn’t want no scrub.

Quick side bar:  A LOT of double negatives going on here, so I guess the one thing I didn’t

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Puff, Puff, Pass.

Tapes and Champagne

Why people should just stopcomplaining about smokers: (In bullet point form)

  • It’s futile.  Just like jacking up the price of cigarettes, or putting all them warning labels on the boxes. People want to smoke, and they will.
  • It’s redundant and unnecessary. Everybody that smokes knows about all the inherent dangers, and the second hand smoke rudeness, and the smoky wardrobes. New warnings please. Let’s move on.
  • It’s an even worse habit than smoking.  And you could die. (Death by cigarette burns. It’s a thing. I’m just saying.)
  • Fresh air is not a right, it’s a privilege. Granted to you ‘non-smokers’, by the smokers. So STFU. Also the air is really polluted anyway. (Bam – science)
  • Second hand smoke is kind of awesome, we spend a fortune on cigarettes, and you basically get to smoke for free. (Talk about looking a gift horse in the mouth.)
  • “Smoking is…

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